We're willing to give you Alberta. They already have the same Queen as you so that part won't be a problem. Think of the advantages. You'll have your very own cowboys and Charlie can go skiing in Banff instead of Gstaad.
What does Canada want in return? Well, here's the best part ... we'll take Scotland off your hands! How's that for a deal? Scotland would be a perfect fit for Canada. We already have a province that thinks it's a country, and Robbie Burns Day is practically a national hollidy.
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At the time of Thatcher's war in the Malvinas, the story was that there was an offer to the Argentinians, "we'll give you the Malvinas if you take Northern Ireland as well".
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